Friday, December 11, 2009
Men could learn a lot from the exchange that I witness between Lydia (3) and Elijah (5) yesterday. I had them helping me clean up the house yesterday and we were done in the living room but Lydia noticed the box of diapers on the floor underneath my piano so she picked them up and asked me what she should do with them. I told her nothing and I wanted them put back where they were. Elijah walks over to her and tries to take the box out of her hands to do it FOR her. Of course she fussed and whined. After telling her to quit whining (drama queen) I told Elijah to let her do it herself. He tells me he just wanted to help her. Lydia looks at him and says "I can do it MYSELF"!!! He says, "I know you can. I just wanted to help you do it". He then lets go of the box and walks away. Lydia pauses for a moment and then says "Ok. You can help me now." You see, she knew she could do it. She was smart enough. She was strong enough. She had the drive. She didn't like it that Elijah was acting like she COULDN'T do it. As soon as he acknowledged her capabilities, she was fine with accepting his help.
I think that is what a lot of women want from a man. Please know my strength. Accept it and celebrate it! But in the process of acknowledging me and my strengths, work WITH me. Help me. Love me. Don't try to put me under your thumb or under your foot. While I CAN carry that box of diapers all by myself, I acknowledge that it would be lonelier and much heavier without my man. And I want my man to acknowledge my personal worth as he helps bear my load.